Parenting

The 5 Conditions Necessary for Raising a Secure Child

Attachment Styles
Do you know your attachment style? How about your partner? If you’re unsure, using an attachment style quiz can help you learn more about the way you function in relationships.  
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Recommend reading:
Wired For Love by Stan Tatkin
Attached by Amir Levine
​The Attachment Project

How to Apologize

When you hurt your partner you must relieve that distress as soon as possible.  Distress is defined as hurt, pain, sadness, frustration, shame and even anger. Your cue to apologize, or repair, is not whether you did something wrong but that your partner has been hurt by something you did or said. When you hurt your partner, taking responsibility is the key to restoring trust in the relationship.

How to Fight Well

​7 DAYS TO BETTER FIGHTS by Stan Tatkin

How to Make Win-Win Agreements

When you and your partner are trying to come to an agreement, it must always be a win-win solution for the both of you. If you have to drag your partner along or get something at their cost, resentment will build up and you likely find yourself re-litigating the unfair deal down the road. You two must work in tandem. It may require a little more negotiation and creative energy, but it is worth it.

Empathy

According to the Oxford dictionary, the word comfort means to be "strong with." When helping someone through a difficult time we are inclined to want to be "strong for" rather than "strong with." Being strong with someone means creating a sanctuary for someone in pain, just sitting down, listening, and allowing the person to acknowledge his or her pain. But we tend to value solution-focused, goal-oriented, and fast, efficient methods for offering assistance to others. We think that helping someone in pain is helping them "get over" the problem -- and fast. But as comforters we need to be "strong with" the person experiencing distress, accepting with them their uncertainty, a process that requires great patience and calm steadiness. We are far less comfortable being in a receptive, open, listening role – which is just what people in distress need most. 
Asking great questions is the key to unlocking the ongoing mystery behind what makes your partner tick. Here are a couple of articles to get you started. 
29 Questions to Deepen Your Connection
40 Questions that Can Build Intimacy in a Relationship
A personality test can help you learn more about yourself and better understand both your strengths and weaknesses. Learning that you might be high on a specific trait can help you gain greater insight into your own behavioral patterns. 
Dr. Brené Brown, Ph.D. LMSW, is a research professor at the University of Houston Graduate College of Social Work. She studies vulnerability, courage, worthiness, and shame. Her groundbreaking research has been featured on PBS, NPR, CNN, and Oprah Winfrey’s Super Soul Sunday and most recently, 60 Minutes. ​​

What is Mindfulness?  
​What Can It Do?

Mindfulness is attention to present experience with no judgment and with open curiosity. It is a quality of attention that can be brought to any experience.  It can be cultivated through various practices or by adopting a mindful approach to life.  As you learn the techniques and principles of mindfulness, you can apply them to any moment in the day.